Reviews of Movies that I have not seen…
The Punisher:
The Punisher: Based on the Marvel comic book character " the Punisher". This movie is filled with violence and mayhem. Stuff gets blown up left and right; people get killed and even say some mean things to each other.
The main bad guy is played by John Travolta who, thankfully, does not dance and plays a bad ass pretty well. Despite this, performance and the fact that his wife is a hottie-go-faster, rumors that Travolta has a queer eye are still in abundance.
Fortunately, instead of working those rumors into the script, they hired that Romjin-soon-not-to-be-Stamos chick as the films lone hottie-go-faster. And, though she does not drop her drawers, she is a welcome addition to the Punisher movie, providing eye candy to an otherwise dark movie.
This movie contains: Violence, a hottie, a cool costume, cool gadgets, stuff blowing up, people getting killed, a cool villain, more stuff blowing up and more violence.
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13 Going on 30
Tom Hanks reprises his roll as a child who wishes he were "big" and then wakes up one morning as an adult.
Whoops, this movie stars hottie-go-faster Jennifer Garner. For those of you who aren't familiar with Jennifer Garner, she is the chick who looks like a female version of Hillary Swank. (Why anyone would name their son Hillary, I don't know)
At any rate, Jennifer goes to bed one night and then wakes up the next day as a 30 year old hottie. Hilarity and childlike hi jinx ensues. Unfortunately, we have all seen this movie before when it was titled "Big".
Unlike the Tom Hanks movie, no one will win an Oscar and this movie sucks - and not the in the good way.
Ironically, this movie was average enough to have been made excellent had their been a few minor script changes. Namely, a few explosions, some violence and, of course, some gratuitous nudity.
This movie contains: An old script, a hot chick, an adult acting like a child, saccharine sweet moments and no killing or maiming.
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