A Moment of Drunken Lucidity
Many people say that drinking inhibits your reactions. Those same people say that it inhibits creativity. Those people are probably going to live with their mother for the majority of their lives.
Anyhow, it seems to me that when one is wasted that one amasses brilliant ideas that, when daylight strikes, disappear into the ether, along with the beauty that the girl I took home possessed the night before.
I am not certain as to why this phenomena occurs. Nonetheless, it does. I am sure that I am not alone, here. I am certain that this occurrence has been shared by anyone who has imbibed copious quantities of alcohol.
As I sit here, a little blitzed, I can recall many occasions when persons unknown to me have devised the perfect plan for world peace, the perpetual motion machine and for a toilet seat that is always warm. Sadly, upon sobering up, these ideas were lost, for forever, never to be found, again. Or at least until the next big party.
There is one particular occasion that I can recall when I came up with the perfect plan. Unfortunately, I cannot remember what the plan was. Also, I cannot remember what it was the perfect plan for. But, I am certain that it was brilliant, because the person with whom I was drinking assured me that it was brilliant. I think his name was Joe...or Bill, or something. Anyhow, he concurred with me, that it was the perfect plan. And I believe him because he was buying that night.
Skeptics would say that drinking clouds the mind and that no good can come from it. In fact, I have been told by many that drinking is a terrible thing and that is should be avoided, at all costs.
Not only are those people really dull, but those people rarely get laid by beautiful women. And I can tell you, right now, that tonight, I am with a beautiful woman. Tomorrow, she may not be so beautiful, but for tonight, she is a goddess. Envy me.
As I think on it, I now understand why Ted Kennedy has remained in office for so long, despite his proclivity for chasing women and killing them in the icy waters of Chappaquiddick he has remained in office because of all of the brilliance that has come from his heavy indulgence of adult beverages.
Ted Kennedy, I salute you!
